Me Talk Pretty One Day*

God, there are some truly WONDERFUL one liners, pithy statements and just genius adjectival descriptions out there. You stumble across them on other blogs, wandering down the street, flicking thru the paper, generally interacting with a widely accepted reality. Why they strike you is a mystery - all you know is: they appeal to the ear, trip off the tongue and generally infuse you with an allover sense of wellbeing. So, presented here in one tidy list form, my favourite insults, descriptions and lines I wish were my own.

1) Leering fucktard

2) Age, size and (lack of) motor skills shouldn't be barriers to style, comfort and a good night's sleep

3) Cockspank

4) Inappropriate massage

5) Knobjockey

6) Lay down and open wide, fella - your whoring days are here

7) A bigger wanker than Corey Delaney

I'll continue to add to this list as I feel it to be necessary. That is all.



* A nod to David Sedaris - he comes up with the genius, I merely steal and degrade it.