Okay, so:
So you know how I like coffee?
Busy BUSY day at work today - there at 0730, finished at 1530, and in between we had 17 outs, 2 fulls, and a gagillion lights - and the penthouse was TRASHED, much to my dismay: I walked in, and was all, F*cking NO! How can people behave like this? This is NOT my job, and my boss - The Man, whom I'm Workin' For - was all, MelWuv, it kinda IS your job - you're a cleaner, and I was giving it the, F*ck that! I was not employed to clean up after animals, and The Man was looking at me going, I don't remember you being so shrill when I hired you... You sound kind of like Elmo... So I was puce with rage, and just standing there shaking and saying things like, F*cking idiots, party like douches, and leave it for someone else to clean, what's wrong with these people, and The Man's going, Do we have to talk about appropriate workplace language, so I've hissed, Come up and have a look yourself, and he did, and he's like, Motherf*ckers, and I was all, Whoa, jumped a coupla steps, and The Man is grumping on about how women can say f*ck, and be all, We're reclaiming the right! but when a man says it, Oh, how dreadful, and we kinda short-circuited there, and got down to it, and anyway, I spent 80 MINUTES scrubbing the kitchen, and there were FIVE of us working in there the whole time - that's 400 minutes spent cleaning the penthouse - (oh, and we were throwing their balloons off the balcony - hours of fun, till we were told to smarten the fuck up) and Mr Fix-It maintenance was there because SOMEONE HAD THROWN A CHAIR OFF THE 20TH STORY PENTHOUSE BALCONY IN TO THE POOL (which was kind of rock'n'roll, so I was almost enjoying that part), and he was all, You're awesome girl - you'll fix it, which was very kind, and so we dragged thru the day, and then at 1530, I was grabbing my bag to get the hell outta Dodge - I was worried if I stood still too long they'd find something else for me to do - when Mr Fix-It grabbed me and said, Hey, look what we've got! and it turned out someone had moved out - our building has residential apartments in it, as well as the hotel rooms, and when ppl move, the hotel lends them our maintenance guys because we're charming - and left behind the stuff they didn't want, or were replacing with whizz-bang new fabulous items in the new house, and guess what? I have an espresso machine that has extra height clearance so you can fill a mug from the machine.
I told you it was the long version
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2 comments:
Awesome coolness.
Was there an Amish convention in town recently?
'gagillion lights' reference had me reaching for the wordsmiths good book, you know the one based in some backwater UK town?
And wtf, no TV in the pool - obviously they were imitators with minimal balls, or credit card limit.
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